Going Ice Queen hurts everytime

So I'm sitting there feeling slightly elated over the news that someone was possibly attracted to me.... when it hits me - I'm now possibly attracted to him because of his attraction to me. And then another thing hits me - I'm back to that very dangerous point where I just may be tempted to be idiotic and go beyond the "you may look but not touch" borders.
In the span of time that it takes for twenty-four frames to cross the screen, I crossed over to the bittersweet realization that I now had to retreat behind my jaded walls of not giving a rats ass over anyone. I had to go ice queen mode lest a harmless infatuation turn into another black hole of drunken nights wondering what the hell was wrong with me.
So there I was, now at the point where I had to say a mental goodbye to something that could have been, simply because it could not ever be. He was, after all, engaged.

Guide back to apathy

Woodbeetle's Guide Back to Apathy:
1. When feeling unlovable, ugly and insignificant - call up a friend:
Literal lifelines are what they are during these times. They will remind you that you are allowed to wallow in your mudhole of self-pity but that you are still beautiful, worthy of proper love and one helluva catch that the miserable loser, whoever he is, allowed to get away.
2. When emotions threaten to drown your capacity for flippant apathy:
Put down the menthols, stop the hunger strike and take a swig of that Jack Daniels bottle next to you. Dying of malnutrition will not help you get back into the swing of things. Numbing the memory cells though, will help you live through a few more hours of undefinable pain.
3. When all else fails and your emotions refuse to disappear:
Allow yourself to be an attention whore. Give it an hour or two. You will soon tire of it - trust me. And with boredom comes apathy. Luv it!

Blooferlady's Guide To Apathy:
1. Vodka or coffee with the ladies. Gossiping about other people and mocking The System is the best distraction.
2. Soundtripping. *Note: This varies with your current state of mind. Blooferlady has found that Bob Marley is the ultimate cure to depression--DON'T ever listen to Sugarfree's Dramachine, Blooferlady shits you not. When je-je-jaded, Billie Holiday, Sitti Navarro, and Bessie Smith. When enraged, the noisier the better (recommended bands: Korn, Rage Against the Machine, Red Hot Chili Peppers).
3. Follow old Eraserheads credo: Shake your head and walk away. *Addendum: Sometimes it's more effective if you scratch your head and blurt out "tanginang yan..." under your breath at the same time. Source: Don Vincent Celis.
4. Sleep and couch til next week.

Response to ultimate break-up songs

Woodbeetle is still chuckling over the ultimate break-up songs. She is heavily indebted to the Pinoy (Pinay?) versions of Volare and Wannabe for making her laugh despite her being sick and her current state of self-imposed apathy over possible loss of muse.
Woodbeetle desperately needs a double vodka mix with the ladies....

The Ultimate Break Up Songs

Ladies, I found mine...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fSPibeE4X8s

And when I'm done with my 5th double Kurant 7...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JdjuuswnfDM

And when I get to my Nth (and business cards are in order)...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IVrIV4SkXYY&feature=related

And when whatever tryst with what's-his-name becomes complicated, as all watchamacallits tend to turn out...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zUNJvsr8k8g

Note: Also posted at http://www.furballchronicles.blogspot.com/

Long hair

Blooferlady:

At one point or the other, women have had that “magical” tingle-slash-thrill over the start of new relationships. Correction: could-be-relationships. The most exhilarating of all (and the most ego-boosting) is when a random Oh-my-God-he’s-so-hot guy comes up to you at a bar to ask for your phone number at the most unexpected of moments.

I was lucky enough to have had that sort of experience while I was out with girlfriends (while bitching about a recent big bad break up), and I couldn’t sum up the experience better than: sheeeeeeeeeeeeeettttttttttttt!!!!

It doesn’t even piss me off that the guy never actually called. I’m not really into the rebound thing anyway. I’m just happy to realize that my “market value”, despite the fact that I’ve aged and gained weight over the past how many years, hadn’t decreased, despite life.

It’s nice to be “out there” in a way.

Now I just need to develop the skill of turning off that nagging heart ache at will.

Woodbeetle:

To be honest, women need the ego boost every now and then, just as much as men do. To quote Blooferlady, that “magical tingle-slash-thrill” never ceases to make me smile; when I allow it to come my way, that is. And despite the fact that the “kilig” moment may not go anywhere, we actively look for it when we feel insecure, bored, jaded or are newly single.

What’s dangerous is when we mistake the flirtation for something possibly more than what it really is. When we feel like we’ve met our match and are challenged by certain charismatic individuals (read: pigs masquerading as men who want you for what seems to be more than one night of passion), we are in danger of slipping down the slippery slope to, well, er, infatuation. One must guard against this deplorable weakness lest it turn one into an over-analyzing, nihilistic, jaded idiot (read: me, right now).

LadyRain:

Key is to just enjoy the moments when they happen. Avoid reading too much into them. Take pleasure in the fact that you are free, beautiful and free to be extra gorgeous.

The big M-word

Woodbeetle:

There are always three people in a marriage. From the moment they say their "I do's" until death or divorce do them part, the couple will always have the shadow of that third party to contend with. And by third party I mean the state.

Blooferlady:

Not to mention the church. And the families, in the Filipino setting. It's a circus out there.

Excerpt from one of Ally McBeal's closing speeches:

"Love in itself is insane. 'He's mad about her.' 'She's crazy about him.' 'He's fallen ass over tea kettle.' What does that expression even mean, 'ass over tea kettle'? It's nonsensical!

...But once you take vows... We start taking it seriously. Once love turns into a marriage, it becomes an institution."

Legal bonds. Compromising. Asset-sharing. Vows. Lifetime commitment. Fidelity. The right of the spouse to fuck you anytime, anywhere, regardless of how you feel about it. The right of the spouse to demand to produce heirs, again, regardless of how you feel about it. The whole thing is a circus. I'm sorry, but at this moment in time, I don't wanna be a freak. Not yet, at least.

LadyRain:

And I seriously do not get why married relatives are worried about us being free and happily single. I do not understand how they could complain about their spouses, and their married lives and yet when they start talking about us, they put on this all-concerned, sorry faces. Seriously.

Woodbeetle:
Pucha. Amen. Wala na akong masabi. Everybody love everybody.


Blooferlady:

But don't get me wrong. If two people are seeing eye to eye, and they see all this, and decide to get married anyway, I think it's awesome.

Okay, romanticism stops here. Back to being cynical. Punyeta silang lahat, lahat ng mga namre-mressure saken to get married now na (on the premise that the biological clock is ticking and all that blah).

LadyRain:

The answer to that biological-clock-is-ticking premise is technology. And of course, money. I'd rather spend millions on that if I really want to, than see myself trapped in a legal agreement forever. And I mean, no-way-out foreverrrr!

Riddle Me These

I find these funny (funny-strange and/or funny-haha). Comments welcome.

Women go to the washroom in packs. (This may very well be proof enough—I may be male.)

People’s sensitivity chips conk out when they feel they have to comment on your appearance. The greeting I hate the most: Tumataba ka…!?

Tipsy people when going to the washroom to pee do the I-can-walk walk.

The Philippines will be run by President Noli De Castro, Vice President Bong Revilla, Jr. or Vilma Santos or JV Ejercito, and most of my countrymen will be so happy about the case and that the sector who will be vehemently against the mere thought won’t be voting at all.

You can liken watching drunks to watching Bambi learning how to walk, or stand up.

Every driver on a highway is convinced that every other driver on that same highway is an idiot.

All subordinates reporting to lenient supervisors are aggressive whiners.

Cats don’t turn their heads around when you call their name. Just like teenagers.
Everybody condescendingly understands-and-is-annoyed-by-people who use the following excuse: I’m in love. (How can you argue with that?)

There are situations in life wherein scratching/shaking your head is the only way to pacify yourself. There are people who illicit this exact same reaction from others as well.
Most irate customers are stupid.

For every couple in a relationship, the man’s job is to be the headache, and the woman has to do the incessant nit-picking. I’m amazed at how some marriages even work.

Life has a natural way of making couples adapt to their marriages. We lose our sense of hearing so we could block out the nagging and all the noise the other makes, and in turn, the others become forgetful.

As women grow older, life leaves them with harsher perspectives of younger women. (The war is on between the teenagers, the twenty-somethings, and the thirty-somethings!)

The number one rule in suburban competition: It’s never a test of skills, but of who wants it more.